


Under the Skin

by ptw30



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Ambiguous Relationships, Gen, Keitor, Platonic Relationships, Romantic Angst, SHEITH - Freeform, Soulmates, for sure, season 5
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-29
Updated: 2018-03-29
Packaged: 2019-04-14 08:07:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14131800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ptw30/pseuds/ptw30
Summary: “In every reality, there’s always you and me."





	Under the Skin

**Author's Note:**

> This can be read as platonic or romantic bonds. Ship as you would like to ship.
> 
> This fic was inspired by [this screenshot.](https://ptw30.tumblr.com/post/172360309089/fic-under-the-skin)

_Pre-Kerberos_

Shiro was mesmerizing in starlight. The way his pale lips twisted upward on one side, how his dark eyes sparkled against the abyss of night – he drunk in the night sky like most people marveled at the sunset.

While Shiro enjoyed the heavens above, Keith enjoyed the sight on Earth. He lay next to Shiro on a small mound just outside the shack, trying to hide that he wasn’t stargazing as much as Shiro-gazing, but Shiro noticed. Shiro always noticed and blushed slightly. It didn’t stop his enjoyment. He scooted closer, so his shoulder rested against Keith’s.

“You’re going to have to come up with me next time, y’know.” Shiro smiled and nudged his elbow into Keith’s side. “The edge of the solar system is something you’ll need to see for yourself.”

Shiro belonged in space. Keith only wanted to belong with Shiro. Space, Earth. It didn’t really matter where.

“You’ll come with me, right?”

Keith snorted and redirected his gaze upward, though his heart thundered in a painful rhythm. “You’ll have to come back first.”

Shiro shifted, those eyes taking on a silver glint. “Hey. You okay?”

Keith glanced away, couldn’t hold that intense gaze. “I’m fine. Just – I’m fine.”

Shiro pressed against his side again, this time wrapping an arm about Keith’s shoulders to draw him close. “Kerberos may be far, but I’ll be back within a year. And we’re going to talk every week, Keith.” There was a pause, one Keith wasn’t sure how to interpret. He risked a glance up to see Shiro’s eyes trembling, worried in a way Keith had never seen them before, especially when staring at the stars.

“Hey. Don’t give up on me, okay?”

“Huh?”

“I’m going to come back.” Shiro wasn’t looking at him, instead gazing off toward the stars above. “Wait for me?”

Keith rolled until he could press his face into Shiro’s shoulder, and he sighed when Shiro’s arms came about him. Promises – they were hard to keep, especially when so many people had broken them.

“It’s all right,” Shiro whispered, a soft vow shattering the silence of the night. Shiro was different. At least, Keith wanted Shiro to be different. “I know it’s difficult for you to trust me, but I will come back, Keith. I’ll always come back to you.”

“You might not,” Keith said, though his arms wrapped about Shiro’s waist like a vice.

Shiro rested his cheek upon the top of Keith’s hair. “I will, and I’ll keep doing it until you finally trust that I’m not going anywhere.”

Muffled, against Shiro’s chest, “You don’t know that. You don’t know how many times –”  

“As many times as it takes.”

* * *

_Post-Naxzela_

Kolivan refused to agree to the terms, but Keith couldn’t deny Shiro anything.

Before Lotor would supply the paladins with any information about the mechanisms of the empire, he requested a meeting with the reckless rebel pilot he’d saved in the final battle. According to Kolivan, Lotor wanted a varga alone with Keith. Shiro had agreed to ten dobashes, but they were without cameras or listening devices. Lotor would be confined to his cell, which Hunk and Pidge reinforced with all kinds of barriers.

“Remember the invisible maze?” Pidge’s smile was wicked. “I upped the voltage. He gets out of the cell, and bacon will be less crispy than him.”

Keith wasn’t worried. Though Kolivan voiced his displeasure all the way to the castle-ship and waited just outside the elevator, Keith didn’t have anything to fear from Lotor. Sure, he wondered why the prince of the Galra Empire would even remember him, let alone want to see him. But if this would get the coalition the inside information they needed to bring down the empire once and for all, then Keith put away any linger doubts and stepped onto the bridge leading to Lotor’s cell.

It reminded Keith of Kaltenecker’s pen, but instead of the digital clouds and grass that mimicked Earth’s farmland, a black screen gave the cell an ominous – perhaps even a morose – ambiance. Lotor sat on the edge of the bed, forearms upon his thighs, his eyes hard and unrelenting. They stared directly into Keith’s soul as he approached, but then the prince stood, towering over Keith’s shorter form, a step higher and a foot taller.

It was surreal to be standing less than ten feet from the former emperor pro tem, after hunting him for so many feebs.

“Lower your mask,” Lotor demanded, and after a bit of hesitation, Keith did as asked. There wasn’t a reason to hide his identity. Everyone knew he was a paladin. So what if he worked for Blade? What he hadn’t expected was for rage to flash through Lotor’s expression.

“What were you thinking? If you had hit that shield, you would have died!”

Keith staggered back, as if Lotor’s shout had physically pushed him. His mouth dropped open, but he wasn’t sure how to respond. Why did Lotor care?

“Did you think about that? Did you think about how it would affect your team?”

That drew Keith back to his senses. “I – I am no longer a paladin.”

“You were chosen by the Red Lion. Nothing will change that.”

How Lotor even knew that, Keith wasn’t sure. “That – That doesn’t – look. There were lives on the line. I would have saved millions, if not billions, including the Red Lion and Voltron. I had to – ”

“You never have to kill yourself, Keith! You know better than that. You never give up, and in that moment, you – ”

Keith threw up a hand and spun around. He didn’t need to listen to this.

“Keith!” How did Lotor even know his name? Maybe Allura or Shiro told him 

“Keith!” Why did Lotor even want to speak to him?

“ _Keith_!”

Keith froze. That was  _Shiro’s_  voice, not the low growl that had become Shiro’s tone since he returned to the castle-ship. Instead, this plea was desperate and warm, like Keith knew Shiro’s voice to be before they separated, before Kerberos even.

When Keith swung toward the cell, Shiro now stood in Lotor’s place. His form was shorter than Lotor’s, so the armor bunched about his elbows and knees. His dark, stormy eyes were kind and gentle, and frightened, like after the Taujeer battle. Shiro had besieged him outside of Red’s hanger, first ensconcing Keith in strong but trembling embrace. Then he held Keith at arm’s length to scold but never took his hands off Keith’s shoulders, like he was afraid Keith would slip away again if he let go.

If Lotor was half-Altean, perhaps he could shapeshift. That’s what this was. The real Shiro was on the bridge, waiting for Keith. Worrying over him. He’d even given Keith a talk about how Lotor would try to manipulate him, and –

“You’re – You’re – ” What was Lotor doing?

“It’s me, Keith,” this Shiro insisted. “The person you found before, wherever you found him – he’s a clone.”

“N-No.” Keith shook his head, his heart torn open all over again. “No! The Black Lion – ”

“ – found someone bottled with my quintessence, enough to lure Black, anyway.”

“But – But – that’s not – that’s not possible.” It couldn’t be. And there was no way Lotor could be Shiro. There’s no way the Black Lion had found someone other than his rightful paladin.

But Lotor looked like Shiro, down to the line between his eyebrows, the one that formed every time Keith worried him.

“Back on Earth, I – I didn’t remember, Keith,” Shiro began, approaching the edge of the cell. Keith edged closer, too. “I was born in the rift, ten thousand years ago. And I’m immortal, I think. At least, I don’t age like Haggar and Zarkon. I live a full life and die, but when I wake up, I’m not in the same reality. I’m – I think I skip through realities and instead of different versions of me – it’s just…me.”

“That’s – That’s not possible.” It couldn’t be. This was just Lotor trying to deceive him…right 

“I wish that were true, but I’ve lived more lives than you could ever imagine. And in this reality – the generals snuck me away from the empire and placed me on Earth, where I grew up away from the empire. They thought I might even escape fighting my parents here, but…” He let out a bitter laugh. “I guess Black had other ideas.”

“So…Takashi Shirogane doesn’t exist?”

“He does in the sense that I was always  _me_ , Keith.” A dimple appeared with a hasty, lamenting smile. “But I am also Lotor, son of Zarkon and Haggar.”

It wasn’t true, and yet Shiro put up a hand, placing it tentatively upon the transparent wall between them. “I don’t know what the clone said to you, to make you leave. I’m not sure I  _want_  to know, but – you know he’s not me.”

Keith felt the tears stinging on the edge of his eyes, and he didn’t have to ask. Shiro would tell him.

“You know because if you needed to leave, I wouldn’t have stopped you. I would have gone with you.”

Keith’s legs gave out then, and he collapsed to his knees, arms wrapped around his middle. The tears fell freely, but he never broke eye contact. Shiro followed him to the ground, crouching near. Both hands touched the screen.

“Keith, Keith! Are you okay? What’s – ”

The transparent wall kept them separated, and all Keith wanted to do was bury his face in Shiro’s shoulder again. “What happened to you? Where did you go? Why didn’t you come back?”

“Black didn’t know if he would survive Zarkon’s final blast.” Regret echoed in Shiro’s raw voice. “He thought the quintessence rupture of his own paladin might destroy him, so he teleported me to the generals. They – They have been with me since one of my first lives. By drinking some of my quintessence, they’ve been able to pass with me through each lifetime, so Black knew I would be safe with them.”

That somehow tore him open all over again. “So you chose to stay with them rather than – ”

“I was the emperor. I thought I could change the empire, make it work for its people. I certainly couldn’t just leave that position for someone like Throk or Sendak to fill.” Shiro’s eyes darkened, and his hands once more became fists. “Once I saw you and the team had managed to fly the lions, I thought I could help you. Give you a common enemy to help you form Voltron again, and it worked.”

“You should have told me,” Keith demanded, and though his heart still remained shattered, it felt more together than it had in feebs. “You should have come back and explained – ”

“ – how I’m Zarkon’s son?” He laughed and gestured to his cell. “I think the others are taking it well.”

Keith snorted and glanced away, before he looked up, wondering. “Why tell me now?”

Rage, unlike any Keith ever witnessed from Shiro, enveloped his face. “Because you were willing to kill yourself, and I cannot – Keith, you have no idea what you mean to me.” 

Keith couldn’t hold that concerned, wounded gaze anymore, but Shiro knocked on the wall, drawing him back. “Hey, hey. Listen to me. In every reality, there is always Voltron in some sense and the rest of the team, too, but – the dynamics are different. Sometimes you lead; sometimes I do. Sometimes Allura is a paladin; sometimes she’s not. But in every reality – you and me. And when I think of my life – Keith.  _Keith_.” Tracks stained Shiro’s cheeks. “There’s always you. You can’t – don’t give up on me. Not yet. Not ever.”

Keith placed his hand upon the barrier, and after a pregnant moment, Shiro mirrored it. Their foreheads came together, and Keith let out a disparaging sigh. He hated his gauntlet for blinking and hated Shiro –  _this_  Shiro – for settling for only ten dobashes. He also hated himself for wanting to do nothing more than curl up in Shiro’s hold and let the universe go on without them.

“The time. Kolivan’s going to come down soon. What happens now?”

“I need you to do something for me.”

Anything Shiro asked of him, Keith couldn’t deny.

“I need you to get off the castle-ship.”

Except that. “What? No way. I’m staying right – ”

“You can’t,” Shiro pleaded, lifting his head from the barrier to stare. “The clone knows you’re the closest person to me. It’s probably why he said whatever he did to make you leave. I can’t risk him going after you again.”

“So instead you’ll let him attack the team?”

“The team can’t tell the difference between us, so they’re not a threat to the clone until they get in his way. I’ll be here to stop that from happening.”

Keith laughed. “You’re in a cage.”

Shiro hitched a shoulder and tapped his temple. “It’s the not the first time, and it probably won’t be the last. At least Black has been keeping me company.”

That caught Keith off guard. “Black knows?”

“Of course Black knows. I asked Black to let the clone fly him, so the team could still form Voltron.”

“I won’t abandon you.”

“You’re not,” Shiro insisted. “I have a plan, Keith. I’m working with my generals. We’re going to remove Zarkon from power and place me rightfully on the throne.”

“How?” It seemed impossible, but then again, how had Zarkon survived the first time. “I’ll talk to Kolivan. The Blade can – ”

Shiro’s eyes hardened into a glare. “You can stay off the castle-ship and be safe with Kolivan.”

“No! How many times, Shiro?”  _How many times are you going to leave?_

The elevator thundered as it began to move, and before Keith’s eyes, Shiro shifted once more, from his human form to that of a Galran prince. Now Lotor didn’t seem so formidable, so menacing, only tired and wrung out from their exchange.  

“Do not give up on me, Keith,” Lotor beseeched as the elevator made its way down the shaft toward the bridge. “ _Please_.”

“You promised you’d come back,” Keith flung back at him. “You promised, and you  _didn’t_.”

Twice. That was it took for Shiro abandon Keith, toss him aside to fight for the universe.

Lotor’s smile was genuine and challenging. “Then what do you call Puig, Thayserix, Ulippa System – and Haggar’s ship?” His left hand twitched and then rose, covering his right shoulder, directly over the place Keith had been injured during the Trials of Marmora. “I will always come back to you, Keith. As many times as it takes.”

Keith followed suit and threw up his mask to hide the fresh tears that stained his cheeks.

As Shiro – the clone – walked onto the bridge, along with Kolivan and Allura in tow, Keith straightened his back and tried his best to hide his sudden apprehension. He felt vulnerable and uncomfortable in his own skin, like the others intruded upon a private moment.

“Your ten dobashes are up,” Kolivan said, tone harsh and condemning. “What did you wish to speak to my kit about?”

Lotor’s eyebrows rose, but he answered nonetheless, “Self-preservation. It is an imperative topic no commanding officer should overlook.”

“Keith is not under your command,” Allura pointed out, rather hostile on Kolivan’s behalf.

“No. I make sure the people under my command know their worth to me. I suggest you do the same.”

Before Kolivan could retort, Keith stepped up to the wall again. “I came. We met. Now it’s time for you to hold up your end of the deal.”

Lotor stared at Keith, patient, unyielding, and then he nodded, slow and tolerantly. “Yes. You did. Thank you…Keith, was it?”

Keith crossed his arms and said nothing. As Lotor spoke – of the planet where upgraded sentries were made, of prisons, of Galra bases, and the kind – Keith’s mind became to wander. His eyes drifted over to the control unit for the room, and with a few taps, Keith heard Lotor’s voice break.

Instead of the depressing black walls, now constellations and the shimmering expanse of space brightened the room and bathed the occupants in an ethereal glow.

Lotor looked upon it with wonder, amazement, and absolute glee. And in this form – and in every form – he was mesmerizing.

Lotor caught Keith staring, like he always did, and he smiled.


End file.
